Death row

Father Lopez was a priest on death row. When asked what it was like receiving the confessions of such terrible men, he would say it wasn't as bad as people made it out to be. Either they would repent their sins and go on to forgiveness with god or they would prove to be very sick men who would in any case be dead in the near future. It was a win-win.

So when he arrived to give Noel Jordan his final confession, he was optimistic and even cheerful. He knew some of the horrible things he had done but also knew the state would soon do God's work and take him off the Earth.

Noel  Jordan didn't look like the other prisoners Lopez had seen. Often, they would be hysterical, yelling or sobbing or maybe both. Others would be deathly calm and inscrutable behind terrible calculating eyes. Noel was different. He was just sitting there, a look of mild irritation in his eyes like someone who's been waiting for a bus a little too long and wants to get on with it.

Lopez entered the cell.

"Hello, my son. Do you have anything to confess?"

Noel looked up, as if noticing the father for the first time.

"Confess? What do you mean?"

Lopez frowned slightly.

"Anything you wish to say or ask for forgiveness from god before your earthy end."

"Oh. Yes."

Lopez waited a moment.

"Well? What is it? Are you seeking forgiveness or not?"

"Ah, sorry father, but no. I just don't know how to say it. I do have a confession. Can I have a moment more to think?"

"Yes, my son, but do hurry. You only have about half an hour."

"That's right, good. I guess I want to say I'm sorry. Not about the death of my wife and 2 children, but the fact I'm completely not sorry about any of it. If somehow they were brought back to life today and I were free, I would do it again."

"Why not make your peace in these final moments?"

"I am. I'm a monster. I killed all three, strangled them and tore them apart with my bare hands and I don't know why. I had to do it, see? You know how when you're a child, sometimes you pull a mean trick on a friend or sibling or somebody for no reason and you have no idea why?"

"Yes."

"It was exactly like that. I've never been in a fight my whole life. Never so much as yanked my dog's chain when I walked him. But it was a compulsion, like scratching your nose or going to sleep. I'm glad this is happening. I need to die before I get that feeling again."

"Do you wish me to pray with you for forgiveness?"

"No. I don't want or deserve forgiveness. I just need to die for what I've done. Tell my story, warn people that it could happen to them. Please."

"A..alirght.."

Noel smiled at him as he left the cell. In less than 20 minutes he would be dead via lethal injection. For the first time since taking this job Lopez was more than a little perturbed.